Today, I throw a monkey wrench in my whole customer service thing: here's where I tell you how much I loathe ass kissing. To me there's a difference between good service and ass kissing, and my take on what those differences entail is, of course, very specific and thought out. Your version will likely be different or you may be someone who prefers to back your rear up on a set of puckered lips. If you're that person, you'll probably want to stop reading right now.
Since I've already gone over what good service is to me, there's no sense in spinning that wheel again. Check it out if you haven't already--it will probably add to what I'm about to say.
Ass kissers are trying to overcompensate for the fact that all they're really trying to do is getting something out of you. They're not trying to build a long term business or personal relationship--they see being associated with you as a way to move up in the world or weasel their way in to something they couldn't otherwise. They're not approaching the exchange as a give and take based on trust and mutual respect--ass kissers are trying to float your ego high enough in hopes you won't notice they're taking something from you without reciprocity.
No one's a perfect judge of character, and as confident I am in my abilities to read most people I'm positive I've been wrong before. This isn't an ego trip for me--I just genuinely dislike being showered with attention I can tell is completely fake. It's a set up and they're trying to create a false sense of trust. I find manipulative dishonesty extremely insulting to one's intelligence.
It's the car salesman that won't talk to a woman unless a guy is there with her. It's the restaurant manager or waiter that makes some big production about a "special" something that really costs them nothing in hopes of a 30% tip on a nice dinner. It's the retail sales person that completely ignores you when you indicate the need for help until you flash a platinum card. It's the sales person or account manager that you can never get a hold of once they got that initial sale after promising to follow up regularly or be hands on during the transition. The examples are abundant.
And if you are a person who enjoys this kind of attention... why? Are you so insecure that you need validation of your importance through false sincerity? Do you enjoy having people bow down and serve you to acknowledge that you are a higher class of person? Are you so lonely that you will take any kind of attention, even if it's fleeting? Is ass kissing just how you define good service? Is there some sort of psychological scar that makes you want to chase those kind of people and "fix" them?
I hold honesty and being genuine in high regard, so it really is difficult for me to see the other side of this coin. But there are so many good people in the world, I just don't see the point in wasting time with the sleazeballs. Why bother wondering if/when they're going to turn on you for a better deal? Hell, why encourage bad behavior by enabling them? Certainly these ass kissers wouldn't stick to it if it didn't work on enough people to make worth their while.
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